What do kids and editing have in common? In this episode, I’m sharing five nuggets my kids have taught me that have helped me become a better editor and business owner. I always say that my kids teach me more than I teach them every day, but I didn’t expect there to be an overlap with my business.
Disclaimer: you don’t need to have kids, want kids, or even like kids to get anything out of this episode. Now let’s dive in!
Review the Transcript
Welcome to The Modern Editor Podcast, where we talk about all things editing and what it’s like to run an editorial business in today’s world. I’m your host, Tara Whitaker. Let’s get to it.
Hello, everyone. Welcome to today’s episode that is going to feature an unlikely duo. And that is my kids. I never would have thought this, but I swear my kids teach me more every day than I teach them.
And in particular, they’ve taught me a lot about myself and in turn about how I run my editing business. Now, just a heads-up, you do not have to have kids or want kids or even like kids to get anything out of this episode either. So I’m just going to share five little nuggets my kids have taught me that have helped me run my business. I know there’s more, but in the interest of time, we’re just going to go over the top five. All right, let’s dive right in.
Number one: practice makes progress. Now, I don’t know about you, but I am an elder millennial (whoever came up with that phrase, ugh), but the phrase “practice makes perfect” was so ingrained in me from a young age.
I mean, I can think back right now to my parents, my grandparents, my teachers, my coaches, literally all the grown-ups in my life telling me this repeatedly about everything, right? Like, practice dribbling and you’ll be perfect, practice this and that and you’ll be great, and you’ll get good grades, etc.
And I know they all meant well. It wasn’t done maliciously or anything, but it is something that now I still have to actively fight against on a daily basis, this whole notion of, well, if I practice, I’ll be perfect, right? The more I do something, I’ll be perfect. We’re humans. We’re never going to be perfect.
So I don’t know why we pushed that narrative at all, but I am happy to say that my six-year-old is already doing way better than I am. Her amazing kindergarten teacher and the school staff at her school are way into “practice makes progress.” And she’s even corrected me sometimes when I let “perfect slip,” or if I say something like, “Oh, that’s perfect,” she’ll be like, “No, Mom, that’s progress.” I’m like, “All right. Attitude aside, I will give you that. You’re right.”
But in terms of launching and building a business, I mean, I can guarantee you, I have not been perfect. And if you’re doing the same thing, you won’t be perfect either. I’m twelve years into business and I can assure you I have been anything but perfect.
And I will continue to be anything but perfect because I’m a human. And that just goes with the territory, right? Any sort of semblance of perfect is just unattainable. And quite frankly, it’s kind of boring. We don’t all want to be perfect, or whatever closeness we can get to that. Ew. And business is one gigantic experiment that I’ve figured out semi-recently. And the sooner we can all grasp that and really take that to heart, the better off we’re going to be.
Because we can learn a certain tactic or strategy from someone, and it might have worked for them, but that does not mean it’s going to work for us. It’s just an experiment as to what will work for you and not pushing for perfection, just trying for progress.
All right. Number two, this is a little bit of a funny one. You don’t know how to do something…yet. This is one of my favorites, even though it’s a little funny. It comes from a show on Netflix called Gabby’s Dollhouse. And my daughter is obsessed with it. Now my son is, too, because my daughter watches it and my son likes it and likes to do whatever his sister does.
So briefly, all the characters are some version of cats. So like, MerCat is a mermaid and she does spa science. DJ Catnip is like a cat octopus, but he’s a DJ and he does all the music stuff. Cakey is a cupcake who bakes, you know, you get the picture. It’s super cute. But anytime that Gabby or one of the Gabby Cats says they don’t know how to do something, they always follow it up with a pause and then “yet,” and it’s such a good lesson for kids, but it’s also a great lesson for grown-ups and adults.
I have taught myself how to do countless things. Like, I didn’t know how to do anything when I started a business—truly. I taught myself how to edit books with the help of editors and teachers, of course. I continue to learn and grow on how to edit books. I’ve learned how to build a website, create social media accounts and run them, send emails, create products. I built a community. I launched this podcast. I became a coach. Like, I had zero clue how to do any of those things before I did them.
And if you had asked me back when I started my business if I would have a podcast or an editing community or be a coach or, you know, know how to do half the things I do today, I’d laugh and be like, “Absolutely not. There’s no way I would never do that.” And yet here I am. And I almost take it as a challenge, that “yet” part, because we won’t get into that. But when someone says something to me, like, “Well, I don’t think you can do that,” especially when I was growing up, that was an automatic, like, “Oh yeah, watch me,” and I would do it out of spite.
Not saying that’s the best approach to take, but I kind of use this in a positive way for myself. Like, “Oh, you don’t know how to do something yet.” Watch me learn, watch me grow, watch me elevate my skills. And by “watch me,” I mean myself, because I’m not doing this for anybody else. You know, when I was growing up, maybe that was different, but now I’m doing this for myself. I’m doing it for my family, of course. But I’m not doing it for any outside validation.
So I take it as kind of a little mini challenge. If that works for you, rock on, if not leave it, but I will embrace the yet. That is where the fun happens and where you sort of allow yourself to grow and learn and know that you aren’t good at something or know how to do something, but you will embrace the yet.
All right, number three. This is pretty similar to number two, but a little bit different. So it’s approaching new things with a growth mindset. Real quick, in case you need a refresher or don’t know, there’s basically two different kinds of mindsets. A fixed mindset is when we think we can’t do something because we’re not inherently good at it. Like we weren’t born with the natural ability, therefore, we’ll just never be able to do it. If you want to learn more about mindset, I talk about it in my third episode, like way back in the day. So you can check that out.
But on the opposite end, a growth mindset is when we approach things sort of like what I just talked about with Gabby’s Dollhouse, where you can learn to do anything. You’re capable of doing things that don’t come easily to you. You don’t have to be born with some inherent natural ability. You have to practice. You have to practice to make progress. You’re able to learn those things.
Because, think about it, relating back to my kids and how they’ve taught me, what if human babies were born and they were just like, “You know what, I don’t know how to do that at birth, I’m just not going to be able to. I just can’t.” Think about how many things that would cover. And that’s silly, right?
So why do we think we should be inherently good at running a business? That’s not a natural skill. And if you’re like me, I was never taught how to run a business. I didn’t have anybody in my family that ran a business. We were all employees, and I was taught through my schooling how to be a good employee, how to manage a boss, how to, you know, how to interact in a physical work environment, which is all for nothing now because I work from home, but you know, of course I didn’t know what I was doing.
So if you’re in the same boat, if you’re starting a business or you’re full into running an editing business, still give yourself grace and give yourself a huge pat on the back for doing something scary that maybe you weren’t quote, inherently good at, but you did the dang thing. That’s something to be proud of.
All right. Number four. Nothing, and I mean nothing, will go according to plan. Now this isn’t meant to be negative, but it’s merely a fact. No matter what, life is always going to happen. When it comes to kids, you can plan everything out to a T. Inevitably, that’s like inviting the universe to come screw it up.
Your kid’s gonna get sick. They’re gonna bust their chin open. They’re gonna have a meltdown. The list goes on and on and on. And that is so hard for me, too, because I am a planner. I want to plan things. I want to know exactly what’s happening and when. And I have had to get very good about being flexible, pivoting, and going with the flow. Not only in my life, but with my business as well.
And obviously those two are very closely linked because if a kid gets sick, you know, I am my own boss. So what does that mean for my business? What am I going to do now to be able to shift, to prioritize my kid? Because that’s always going to be a thing. I will always prioritize my family over my business.
But now what does that look like? Do I need to work late or early? Do I need to push out a deadline? Do I need to rearrange some things? Knowing that it’s going to happen is kind of a relief. Because it does allow some, I guess, wiggle room in my brain that I don’t have to plan it out so much because it’s just going to blow up anyways.
I know that sounds negative, but I promise it’s actually—for the type of anxious brain that I have, it’s a relief. It’s also taught me to always factor in buffer time with anything business or personal related, but especially with business deadlines, which I kind of talked about in the previous episode about taking time off.
If you always include buffer time, then you always have a little bit of white space to work with when that #life happens. This is all easier said than done, too, right? Like I said, I’m a planner. I want to know when, how, all the things, but it’s just, it’s impossible. And letting go of that perfection with the planning does actually help in the long run.
Okay, number five, last but not least: things don’t take as long as I think they do. Now, let me start by saying this. In some ways, having kids has taught me that everything takes longer than you think it will. Great example. My husband and I sat down last night after the kids went to bed to watch a 45-minute show. It took us an hour and a half. There were things happening, like It was mostly kids, but you know, it took twice as long to watch something.
You think we’re going to sit down and watch a 45-minute show and it ends up taking an hour and a half. That’s very normal, but there’s also this thing called Parkinson’s Law. And if you don’t know what that means, it essentially means that you allow a task to take up the entire time that you allotted to complete it. So this is different than tracking your time or estimating how long something is going to take. This is more like saying, “Okay, I’m going to give myself an hour to write this blog post,” and it takes you the full hour to write that blog post. But in actuality, you probably could have done it in thirty minutes or maybe forty-five minutes. But because you had the full hour, you kind of stretched it out in whatever way that is. Maybe you, you know, sat and stared at your screen for a while. Maybe you checked Instagram. Maybe you got up to grab a coffee.
Like, you gave yourself an hour, so you’re gonna take an hour. And that’s not necessarily bad, by any means. But after I had kids, that did not work for me. They taught me that I had to get really good with my time management, because if they went down for a nap, let’s say I had two hours—maybe again, life happens, they’re going to wake up early—but if I had two hours, I had to get stuff done in those two hours. That was not the time for me to be scrolling or, you know, going out to eat, I don’t know, random things that aren’t what I’m supposed to be doing. I had to put butt in chair or feet in front of standing desk or whatever, because the countdown was on.
I had two hours, I had stuff to do, and this was the only time I can do it. It’s got to get done. So it is amazing now how much I can get done then before I had kids, because I totally would stretch out my time. And then again, not that that’s a bad thing. I definitely had more leisure time and I could do that. But now with kids and having this specific schedule or, you know, specific times that I can work, I had to get really good about being intentional with my time.
So there it is. Those are five things that my kids have taught me about running a business and being a human. I know there’s more, like I said, but I could go on and on and on and I like to keep these pretty short and sweet. So I’m sure they’re going to teach me even more as the years go on. So maybe I’ll have more little fun tidbits for you, but I hope you enjoy hearing about some kid cartoons, go watch Gabby’s Dollhouse, even if you don’t have kids, and hopefully you had some fun getting corrected by a six-year-old about being perfect. God, kids are so humbling and so insightful. So I know we’re going to have some more lessons, but for now I will leave that be. Thank you for listening.
And I do want to give you a quick heads-up. I want to give you a little teaser for the next episode. I have a very special guest coming to chat about her new book. I’ve never had a guest on the podcast before, so this is going to be super exciting and just the beginning of a ton of interviews that I have planned for the rest of the year. If you want a little sneak peek or a hint as to who’s coming, you can take a peek at my Instagram at @taramqwhitaker and see some details there.
So until next time, keep learning, keep growing, and know that we’re all cheering you on even my kids.
Thank you so much for tuning in to today’s episode. If you enjoy The Modern Editor Podcast, I would be so grateful if you left us a review over on iTunes. And as always, you can head to TaraWhitaker.com to connect with me and stay in touch. We’ll chat again soon.
Lesson One: Practice Makes Progress
As an elder millennial, the phrase “practice makes perfect” was ingrained in me from a young age. I have to fight against the notion of perfection on a daily basis. Luckily, my six-year-old understands that “practice makes progress” and reminds me of it all the time.
When it comes to launching and building a business, I can guarantee you that I haven’t been perfect. I’ve accepted that “perfect” is unattainable and boring, and business is one giant experiment. All we need to try for is progress.
Lesson Two: You Don’t Know How to Do Something…Yet
This lesson comes straight from one of my daughter’s favorite shows, Gabby’s Dollhouse. Anytime the characters say they don’t know how to do something, they pause and then they add “yet.” This is such a great lesson for kids and adults. I’ve taught myself how to do so many things, including editing books and running a business, and I’m still learning more as I go.
I didn’t know how to do any of my endeavors before I started doing them. If you had asked me back when I started my business if I would ever become a podcast host or a coach, I would’ve laughed because I didn’t know how to do either of those things.
Now, when I don’t know how to do something, I take it as a mini challenge for myself. When you embrace the “yet,” that’s where the fun happens and where you grow.
Lesson Three: Approaching New Things With a Growth Mindset
There are two different types of mindsets: a fixed mindset and a growth mindset. A fixed mindset is when we think we can’t do something because we aren’t inherently good at it. A growth mindset is when you approach new things from a place of development. You can learn more about mindset in episode three of the podcast.
With a growth mindset, just because you don’t have a natural ability for something doesn’t mean that you can’t learn how to do it and practice until you become good at it.
You can’t expect yourself to be perfect at something, such as running an editing business, the first time you try it. Instead, you need to give yourself grace and pat yourself on the back for doing something scary.
Lesson Four: Nothing Will Go According to Plan
When it comes to kids, you can try to plan out every little thing, and something unexpected will always happen that throws you off your plan. Your kid will get sick, they’ll bust their chin open, or have a meltdown. You have to get very good at pivoting and going with the flow when things like this happen.
The same is true for your business. You’ll need to work early or late, push a deadline, or rearrange your schedule. It can actually be a relief to know that things won’t go according to plan because it allows for some wiggle room. You don’t have to plan so much when you know it will blow up anyway.
I know that sounds negative, but for an anxious mind, it’s actually a relief. It’s taught me to factor in buffer time, especially with business deadlines. I talked about this more in my episode about taking time off. When you include buffer time in your deadlines, you have a little bit of white space to work with when life happens.
Lesson Five: Things Don’t Take as Long as I Think They Do
There’s a concept called Parkinson’s Law that states that you allow a task to take up the entire time you allot for it. For example, if you give yourself an hour to write a blog post, you’ll write it in an hour. However, you could’ve probably done it in thirty or forty-five minutes, but you stretched out the process because you gave yourself a full hour.
My kids have taught me really good time management. If they take a two-hour nap, that means I have two hours to get some work done, which doesn’t allow for any distractions. Before I had kids, I would stretch out time. Now, it’s amazing what I can get done in a short amount of time when I’m intentional about it.
Important Sections
- (0:56) Lesson One: Practice Makes Progress
- (3:28) Lesson Two: You Don’t Know How to Do Something…Yet
- (6:20) Lesson Three: Approaching New Things With a Growth Mindset
- (8:19) Lesson Four: Nothing Will Go According to Plan
- (10:31) Lesson Five: Things Don’t Take as Long as I Think They Do
- (13:44) Episode 35 Teaser
Resources Mentioned
- Episode 3: Why Mindset is More Than Just a Buzzword
- Episode 33: How to Take Time Off as a Freelancer
- Parkinson’s Law